A great day to go to the park

 

 MJ has talked about taking Ashby to a park near her old house.  It is in the state park and is an open adventure play are that is ideal for running and climbing.  This afternoon looked like the perfect time. 

It took him a while to figure out this place.  I think he kept looking for an theme or a purpose. But he slowly warmed to the notion.  There were very few other children there for him to study so he had to rely on MJ to lead the way.  By the time we left he was climbing and running and even walking across the 'hanging bridge' - relax Mom it is about 8" off the ground. 

He came home tired, ate a big dinner, had a shower and hair wash (much faster for a tired kidlet) two stories and said - "Good Night Mary Jean" and was out. 

Street creds

A short diversion from the Ashby chronicles. I have discovered that I need street creds if I want to claim to be a Baltimorean.  In idle conversation at a small store, with the nursery school lady or even the dog walker there is some interest that I grew up here.  I quickly learned that Lutherville is equal to Mars.  Towson has a little more cred worthiness since the street car ended there.  Grew up in Loch Raven Village - doesn't even register with real downtown Balmorean's.  The street car never went there and no one from Canton ever aspired to move there.  Maybe Parkville but none of the above.  The real cred is in my trump card.  "My daughter lives in Locust Point, in the block down from my sister."  And in truth, it is really nice to say my sister lives in the next block.  I can't think of anywhere I have ever lived where that statement would get the knowing head nod of approval.  And it is really nice.  Almost makes me want to move here - except who knows where Meagan and MJ will be in a year.  So I guess I will stay in Charlotte - at least that usually elicits - oh I was there once or my cousin moved there. 

Wednesday

For hump day it has been pretty uneventful. We are getting up around 6:30 but tomorrow may be a little earlier since Duke and Ashby seem to be up at 6:15; that would give us a little more time to get ready for school. Today was crazy head day in the morning before we went to his gym class. But after we stopped at Whole Foods and had lunch at home he headed off to nap with no complaints. We lured him up when MJ arrived and she wonderfully offered to take him to the park by herself since the kitchen was littered with work debris and I was going to cook a little dinner.

I am learning from my sister - let the little energetic legs run the errands. So when socks go flying it is easier to wait on the steps while he hunts them down. Energy expended! We are learning to put on our own underwear. I am doing really well, but the little guy is still in the silly stage of two legs together every time before he tries again and gets it right.

This is MJ's story but I will share it. He came home hot and sweaty having climbed to the top of the dragon and then slid down the fireman's pole. Once he conquered it once he was on a mission to perfect his technique.

He wanted to go out after dinner to stomp rockets so he ate quickly and we headed down for a half an hour of stomping. He was far more interested in the other kids especially the boys practicing baseball with Dad's. He persuaded MJ and I to take a turn most so he could watch the boys.

The exchange for going out after dinner was one show, a fast bath and then two stories. He was fast asleep before I finished the dishes. 

Tuesday afternoon

Arrived on time at nursery school for pick-up and we headed out to Chipolte's for lunch. No foodie review except it isn't as good as last time. Nap time was relativity easy since he was tired. He asked if Aunt Mary was coming after nap and I said yes and if he went right to sleep and had a good nap we would all go to the park. Within minutes of hitting the pillow he was gone.

After a slow wake up and some negotiating on if we could all stay home he got dressed, chose a soccer ball and his book bag with the stomping rockets and off we went. After a little soccer and then fire the rockets at MJ and me we slowed down and walked home. Ashby showed MJ how to paint/sticker on the iPad and the tried to get her to play angry birds. It is hard for someone right handed. I quickly wised up and cut off his Internet access since he was about to go on a buying binge for extra help!

Dinner was yummy. Thanks Meagan for the lets dish dinner. Everyone including Ashby cleaned their plates. After some table chat while Ashby played on the floor with his cars we headed up for our new nighttime routine. Mary is taking Octonuts duty while I get snack and bath ready. Tonight was hair washing. We had decided to use the hand shower since he did so well last night with a shower off to get rid of the bubbles. Since we had four hands it went smoothly.

MJ did first story and then headed out to see her poor abandoned hubby. Thank you Bill for sharing her evenings with us. After second story and thee lame songs. "Nana those are stories not songs". Maybe it is Gregorian chant. Despite protestations that he was not tired he was asleep in about 10 minutes.

I have to confess I am not getting him down for nap or bed quite on time. Lunch and play spills over and we do our best to be in bed by 1:30 and then 7:30 at night. Tomorrow morning is gym but it is a later start so I promised him that he could stay in pj's a little later than today.

Tuesday morning

6:15 the intrepid guard dog lumbers up and moves the few feet to Ashby's door. I turn over for 15 minutes more of sleep. Alarm goes off at 6:30 and I open Ashby's door to start the getting up process, pull on sweats and take Duke across for the early morning business. Ashby is waiting for us and ready to play. But I am on a schedule shower, breakfast, dressed and out the door by 8:15 to head to school. My life on timers. 15 minutes of play, followed by an Ocoto segment on tv while I shower and then breakfast, clothes, teeth, sunscreen and out the door at 8:15 on the dot.

My back seat driver gives me directions to the school, we find a parking place and then I can't figure how to get him out of the car seat. Oh! The red button release is on backward and I don't have the strength to push the button. Ashby watches me wondering how I didn't know this simple direction. He asks if I forgot to write it down since I am always referring to the notebook for everything else. I finally free him and we walk over to the school being greeted by a teacher who graciously walks us to his classroom. Along the way Ashby has another worry - did I write down "a hug and a kiss before I leave". I reassure him that I would never forget the hugs and kisses. Now to squeeze in some work before heading back at 11:10 to pick him up.

The Ashby Journal

On Sunday, after months of planning, worrying and planning Meagan and Mike set sail on a cruise to the Bahamas. It was the first time Ashby's parents had been away together sans wee tot since he arrived nearly four years ago. Each parent had been away on business but the other parent was always on-site. They had not had any daytime babysitters and had adjusted their lives to always have a parent do the dinner, bath and bed routines. Occasionally slipping out for a few hours after he was sound asleep. So leaving him with me for seven days was a BIG deal.

It was with trepidation that I had agreed to spend the week at their house. For those of you who know me well know that while I love my grandchildren in have never been the sleep over Nana. I still work, children live in distant states so unlike some of my friends the grands don't just come over for the weekend.

With all this lead up I feel like a faker to report on the week but in the absence of his blogging Mom I will try to keep the chronicle of his week.

Day One - or rather the afternoon of the first day I woke him from his nap with the news that his FAVORITE Aunt was ready to take him to the neighborhood park. We packed him up with his wagon full of trucks and diggers and walked the two blocks to the park. He promptly unloaded all of the equipment,pushed around some mulch and decided he needed his snack. With his back turned a small posse of toddlers descended on the trucks and shovels like moths to the flame. He watched them indulgently and said it was ok to play with his toys. I think he was slightly amused by one of the little guys who seemed to find sharing unacceptable. With a few minutes he abandoned his treasure trove and lured his Aunt to the other side of the park to drive the Pirate ship and embark on a game of pretend. I stayed and guarded his booty and got the occasional wave. In about a half hour his Uncle Bill came back from the gym and persuaded him to join him in running between the goal posts on the field. A thoroughly tired pre-schooler came back ready to pack up his gear and head home. Mary kept him busy downstairs while I pulled together a dinner Meagan had started before she set sail.

During dinner he asked "where's Mommy". It was a tense second but we asked him where she was and he said she was on the big boat. Asked and answered and we moved on. Next step was bath and bed. Mary and Ashby watched his show while I ran his bath. After managing to splash everyone he was dried, slathered with lotion and ready for his two books,a little snack, teeth brushing and three songs. Mary and I did a duet for the last song after each doing our best for our solo events.

End result. 3pm to 7:15pm. Three adults,one preschooler = successful transition.

But wait there is more. This morning we defrosted some of Mommy's yummy pancakes and moved slowly to time to get dressed. I had some secret aspirations for the day but his Mom had warned me that he really liked to hang out in his pj's and take his time on non-school days. By 8:45 I headed to the shower while he watched a segment of Cars. Quickly bored he came on to watch me put on my face. Somehow we ended up in his Mom's comfy chair in the bedroom with her IPad playing a game, painting pictures. I abandoned thoughts of taking the bus up to buy play bandaids as our outing. Then at 11 he announced it was time to get him dressed and we should go somewhere in my car. I will spare you the details of getting him in his car seat. But thank you Mike for leaving the manual under the seat cover. Off to HT for allergy medicine and a reminder to me that shopping with any child under 20 is an event. Thankfully he was willing to hang on to the end of the cart and wait patiently for his cookie at check out. Then I foolishly headed over for a quick stop at the $1 store for the play bandaids. All of you parents know what comes next. I the aged Nana forgot. What is in the $1 store --- treasures. None of which is suitable for anyone who is not intent on shooting out the eye of their friends and neighbors. I had no idea how many toys had pointy ends and methods of sending them through the air. After many trips back and forth along the aisle with several recommendations that Mommy would not like that toy we settled on a fire truck with multiple small parts easily able to choke a toddler if ingested. Back home, running late we quickly had grilled cheese and fruit and headed up to nap. No tv show because of the time. After spending 20 minutes swinging bunny in ever growing arcs I opens the door and said "if you don't lay down and pull up your covers and go to sleep we can't go to the park this afternoon". Ah the power of his favorite person. He promptly pulled up his covers and went to sleep. I had to wake him at 3:15 so he could go with MJ to the park. This is where I have to confess to this being a boondoggle MJ bundled him out with his T-Ball equipment and stomping rockets to the park while I stayed home and made dinner. Dinner was on time. MJ and I took a few minutes of conversation and the up to start the bedtime routine. This time Ashby snuggled up in MJ's lap to watch his favorite show while I got bath and snacks. MJ did the bath honors and at his request his stories and songs.

Here is my confession. I could never have done this without my sister living in the next block. She does it effortlessly. I am a wreck worrying about schedules and balanced mess. Thank heavens for veggie packs to fill in the nutrition missed. So I guess it does take a village to raise a wee tot.

Tomorrow is our first school day. We have laid out his outfit. The coffee is made.

So Mom and Dad you have done a great job raising a wonderful child. He is willing to go with the program and gives us clear instructions. Now is time for you to renew your energy and know that your wee tot knows down to the end of his tippy toes that he is loved and that you have made good plans for him.

President's Day

February 22 was traditionally Washington's Birthday and a federal holiday.  Sometime ago the government collapsed February 12 (Lincoln's birthday) and Washington's birthday into one federal holiday - President's Day and reassigned it to the third Monday of February.  Why do I even know this?  Well February 22 is also my Dad's birthday. 

As the kids left the house, Dad got into the birthday mood.  Maybe he was always in the birthday mood but I didn't notice it until later.  As the years went on it became the first "family" event of the year and we would gather to celebrate.  It was a good holiday - there were no competing events or in-laws that would be slighted if we went to Dad's house instead of theirs, so it became a ritual that everyone came home for  Dad's birthday.  As he got older he began to plan for the milestone birthdays almost a year in advance, moving it to a hotel with catered lunch and a clown or magician for the kids.  True we were a big family with five children, spouses, grandchildren and eventually great grand children and we could fill a house quickly, and this way Mom didn't have to cook and  clean and there was a definite end time. 

Until I hit 60 I didn't really understand how important this Benson Holy Day really was.  Dad was celebrating being alive - against all predictions having had open heart surgery when he was in his early 30s and again to replace the valve - he had survived exceeding all expectations.  And it was a time when the focus of the gathering was not on presents, it did not compete with Easter or grand children's sports.  He used to tell me that a birthday is a time for the celebrant to give gifts not receive them.  It was the birthday boy/girl who was grateful. 

So happy birthday Dad.  I am sorry we have not been successful in keeping the family tradition of one Benson Holy Day - or maybe we just haven't found one that includes the siblings and all of the generations.  I hope each of us offspring find a way to continue the tradition in our own families.  A day of thanksgiving that is kept holy in each family - a day that is marked on the calendar as recurring every year.