Wednesday, April 3, 2013

President's Day

February 22 was traditionally Washington's Birthday and a federal holiday.  Sometime ago the government collapsed February 12 (Lincoln's birthday) and Washington's birthday into one federal holiday - President's Day and reassigned it to the third Monday of February.  Why do I even know this?  Well February 22 is also my Dad's birthday. 

As the kids left the house, Dad got into the birthday mood.  Maybe he was always in the birthday mood but I didn't notice it until later.  As the years went on it became the first "family" event of the year and we would gather to celebrate.  It was a good holiday - there were no competing events or in-laws that would be slighted if we went to Dad's house instead of theirs, so it became a ritual that everyone came home for  Dad's birthday.  As he got older he began to plan for the milestone birthdays almost a year in advance, moving it to a hotel with catered lunch and a clown or magician for the kids.  True we were a big family with five children, spouses, grandchildren and eventually great grand children and we could fill a house quickly, and this way Mom didn't have to cook and  clean and there was a definite end time. 

Until I hit 60 I didn't really understand how important this Benson Holy Day really was.  Dad was celebrating being alive - against all predictions having had open heart surgery when he was in his early 30s and again to replace the valve - he had survived exceeding all expectations.  And it was a time when the focus of the gathering was not on presents, it did not compete with Easter or grand children's sports.  He used to tell me that a birthday is a time for the celebrant to give gifts not receive them.  It was the birthday boy/girl who was grateful. 

So happy birthday Dad.  I am sorry we have not been successful in keeping the family tradition of one Benson Holy Day - or maybe we just haven't found one that includes the siblings and all of the generations.  I hope each of us offspring find a way to continue the tradition in our own families.  A day of thanksgiving that is kept holy in each family - a day that is marked on the calendar as recurring every year.

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