Dinner converation

Once a month I get together with several women from the neighborhood for dinner.  We choose a different restaurant every month - with several repeats as favorites.  It is an eclectic group that started with a small core of women who knew each other and expanded by word of mouth to a group that includes about 20 names.  The size of the group varies depending on other activities but there is a small core of about 8 of us who are usually there.  Many of us only see each other once a month, but occasionally someone makes a suggestion for a road trip or event and sends out an invitation.

I love these dinners.  The group has no real reason for being, we come from different backgrounds, some of us are retired, others working, but it isn't a Golf Wives group, or work group.  So what is my gripe?  The flip side of only knowing each other casually, we don't really know each other's religion unless someone mentions something in passing, like my talking about my first experience actually cooking a brisket for "EastOver", and that was really about food and my lack of experience with both pressure cookers and brisket.  And we don't know each other political opinions.  Well that isn't quite true,  I know many people's political opinions and I choose not to debate them.  For some reason there is a strain of Republican's that doesn't just support the Republican platform but feel it is perfectly ok to denounce the President with a vitriol  unlike I have ever heard before.  It isn't even about policy usually it is about traffic being backed up today because the President flew out at 4:30 pm that some how translates into comments way beyond the issue.  I felt like saying try living or working in DC and having roads/sidewalks closed without notice while a motorcade with someone important passes through.  You may not have voted for the current President, you may not like the party positions, you may not like the economy, the weather, poverty, uncomfortable conversations on poverty, wages, freedom of religion and what that means, but they are conversations about policy and  it would be wonderful if we could actually talk about the issues without immediately launching into charges that obviously someone who was brought up a secret Muslim is trying to ruin our country.  The level of absolute stupidity has risen to a level that is exhausting.

Let's talk about my conspiracy theories on "think tanks" that are writing legislation for Republican held states and localities that has become a cut and paste policy to be put forward without question.  A city in our state may have been too balanced in the last election, so at the State level let's introduce legislation to redraw the districts and reduce the number of council members - no local input required.  It is "good" policy to over rule the Agriculture Commissioner who prohibited weapons at the State Fair,  No need in our State to focus on crumbling infrastructure, some of the lowest paid teachers in the Nation, let's introduce legislation that will allow you to pass on the double yellow line if the vehicle in front of you is going to slow.

I don't want to listen to the hate propaganda from either party, it is exhausting.  There are no issues that are being debated from any point of logic.  We now have people in high office that deny that there might be something going on in the environment that deserves actual scientific thought, there is still debate going on about creationism vs evolution, elected state officials feel that they with their advanced degrees in something should have the right to rewrite the history taught in school.  I am sad.  We have become a nation of hate, of absolutes -- you must absolutely buy into one agenda or the other - no questions asked.  I wish more people had actually taken history classes and maybe a small dose of civics.

The Sunday dinner table and other myths

I grew up in the era of Ozzie and Harriet. It was one of the TV shows that we watched, and of course I fell in love with David and the Ricky. But it always seemed like TV not real. It wasn't my family reality. So the question is have I continually battled with trying to achieve that TV wonderfulness and sadness with missing the mark. Do I want to have Sunday dinner with the Commissioner? I do notice that the men at the end of the table are always right and there no women who are their peers. My family reality is we have a great blended family with seven children in 6 cities spread from California to England. They all have families, with children and jobs. Seven children each with ties to ex's and in-laws, sports schedules, school schedules and lives of their own. I have been very proud of my children's ability to "grow where they are planted". They have active lives with friends and commitments. And I have done the same.

We talk, occasionally face time or Skype (I have to get better at that) and try to get one group or the other together for a holiday and occasional vacation. So why when I had a wonderful Easter dinner with friends and a borrowed Mother for kibitzing did I feel like it was missing something? Why do I keep feeling that a holiday dinner should be shared with children and grandchildren? I need an attitude adjustment.

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