Happy Birthday Baby

Twenty eight years ago Peter arrived. He changed all of us forever. Pete took awhile to arrive, more than 24 hours and two hospitals before he decided the time had come. We moved from our small town hospital across the causeway to the 'big' hospital because a c-section became part of the plan. I think the ambulance ride and the smell of McDonald's did it. His poor Dad had waited and waited and held my hand until finally we arrive at hospital #2 and the nurses tell him to go get something to eat because it would be awhile before the surgeon arrived. Dad arrives back in winter parka, snow boots with McDonald's bag in hand only to be told to suit up - plans had changed and baby was on the way. Happy Birthday baby!

Friends

For those of you who know me you can skip to the end for the punch line. Otherwise here is the background. When we moved this time we made an effort to find a neighborhood where there would be other people like us - empty nesters, far from home base. And we have found great friends. We enjoy each others company for dinner, celebrate birthdays, play golf, shop all of the things you do with friends. But the greatest surprise and gift has been finding a best friend. All four of us enjoy each others company, tolerate each others foibles, are truly interested in the children and grandchildren, and are there in a pinch.

Zed (the one eyed wonder Yorkie) woke up this morning feeling a little punk, he went out and did his business, had breakfast and went back to bed. By mid morning he seemed to perk up a little, so we went for a walk and then I went out to lunch for 2 1/2 hours with two friends. When I got home he was sitting at the top of the staircase staring at me unable to come down the stairs on his own. So -- took him out, he was hunched over like either his back or tummy hurt - alot. Since this always happens after regular vet hours we headed out to the emergency doctor.

I called Betty to see if she was busy (having just gotten dropped off from lunch) and she was on her way out so I said quickly where I was going and I would call when I got back. I was frantic and feeling terribly guilty. The little guy was trembling and taking little baby steps. He didn't wimper but you could tell he felt terrible - tail and head down, little hairs trembling.

We got all of the preliminary screening done and the doctor had just arrived when Betty walked in and said - how are you doing. She stayed with us, kept conversation going, Zed snuggled in under the chair and some element of peace rained. We got our meds (pain killer and muscle relaxer until Monday when we see our vet - no obvious signs of broken bones, herniated discs) Betty hustled Zed out the door into freedom - where he perked up enough to pee and poop, while I settled the bill.

That is a friend. Somebody who is willing to hang in even if it is boring, they really have something else to do, and you don't even have to ask.

Snapshots

My mother has been divesting herself of pictures that were on the walls of the family room. Some I had copies of but some were Polaroids that I took just for her. My son scanned in several and posted them on Facebook.

These were taken in the summer of 1972. We lived in Texas then - Michael was turning four and Kama turning two. It was the summer I was pregnant with Meagan. Even then Michael was marching to his own drummer.

It was a long hot summer and my energy level was at an all time low. This photo makes me cry - as cute as they are hand in hand going down the road - I think they may have been planning to run away.

Spring

There are hopeful signs that Spring is just around the corner. The daffodils are up and the pansies are blooming. The birds are emptying the bird feeder daily. Spring is always so hopeful, I always seem to get a new burst of energy when the clock springs forward and the days get warmer.

We have lived here for almost 5 years and done some landscaping, adding one or two new plants. Last year my wonderful son-in-law added a new planting area with butterfly bushes and gardenias. I am looking forward to them filling out and blooming this year.

The front needs a major overhaul. The original owners planted mondo grass in front of the walk. Unfortunately it is the variety that spreads like wildfire. Inter-mixed is crabgrass, weeds and a healthy dose of golf course grass. Not an attractive sight. Last year my excuse was that at least it held down the dirt. I think this year I need to bite the bullet and get rid of the mondo grass and move on to something that can be tamed.

Heartbreakers

There is something about a wet kiss and someone to pull your hair that is irresistable. I was very lucky and lived just three hours away when he was born so I got to see him and snuggle him from the beginning. Now he is seven hours away - too far for a quick trip. My daughter chronicles his story in her blog giving updates and new pics. I read it every morning, even before the newspaper. It is never enough - I try to peak around the edges to see if there might be more. I understand why parents relocate to where there children live when they retire.

How to be a good Nana

New parents have thousands of books and articles focused on how to be a good parent. There is very little guidance on how to be a good grandparent. Becoming a Nana is not for the faint of heart.

This is the fourth time I have joined the ranks of Nanahood. The first three were much easier. I was too young to really be a Nana and worked too hard and lived too far to have much of an effect. This time I am older, wiser and ready to be a Nana.

Becoming a fully engaged Nana is challenging. How many of us don't wish we had some do-overs in how we raised our own children, or now with the wisdom of time and experience don't wish we could have done some things differently. Combine that with what has been learned, what is the current thinking in child raising and you have a basketful of questions.

But once they break your heart it is too late to turn back.